Religious Discussions at Work

Dear Madame L,

A work colleague is constantly asking me questions about my religion (I'm a member, as you are, of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints), but his questions (and his tone when we talk about this) make it clear that he doesn't really want to understand our teachings but rather to poke fun at my faith.

Do you have any suggestions for how to deal with this person?

Sincerely,

Trying to Be a Good Christian But My Christian Friend Says I'm Not One Anyway

Dear Trying,

Madame L notes that the political atmosphere in this country is such (thanks to Newt Gingrich) that animosity prevails, so even private religious beliefs have become fuel for political fires and antagonism thinly disguised as "humor."

Madame L has dealt with such work colleagues in the past by patiently answering their questions and ignoring the subtext of hostility and ridicule. When the questions persisted, Madame L has invited her "friends" to talk to the missionaries so they could learn more about the church, at which time the colleagues stopped pestering her. They also stopped being "friends," which, frankly, did not bother Madame L in the least.

Madame L hopes you will continue to answer your fellow employee's questions in the spirit of Christian compassion, while reminding him/her that you would never make jokes or ask frivolous questions about his/her religious beliefs. 

Remember how Christ himself responded to hateful and bigoted people, and keep trying to follow Him.

With sympathy,

Madame L

Comment on Refusing Ambulance Service

Dear Readers,

Madame L received the following comment (edited to remove personal identifying information) from a reader who was unable to post the comment online:

"How shocking about the old lady who skinned her knee and got charged for it! I hope she fought it.  What right do they have to charge someone when they never told her there was a fee for their services?  (Aside from the whole fact  that it's appalling to be charged so much for a band aid.)  I remember on New Year's Eve I was carrying my son back to the car and I slipped off the curb and fell with him and he knocked his head pretty badly on the sidewalk, and we took him to an ambulance stand where they checked him out and said that he probably didn't have a concussion and offered an ice pack.  They never asked our information or anything, just treated us and let us go.  My son thought it was pretty exciting to have gotten to go inside the ambulance."

This comment prompted Madame L to look for the news article about the old woman who was charged for a bandaid  from an ambulance "service" --- where Madame L discovered that the actual amount the woman was charged was not just $600 or so, but $765. The woman DID complain, and the hospital refused to reduce the charge, so the woman complained to the local newspaper, which was eventually able to get the hospital/ambulance service to throw out the fee entirely. It's also interesting to Madame L from the article is the following information:

Even when ambulance services are refused, the patient is almost always charged for the full amount, as if the patient had been transported.

A representative of the hospital which provided the ambulance "service" at that event said that, "...if people need help, but it's not an emergency, they should have a careful conversation with ambulance medics, not police or other on-site responders. Ask what services might cost and whether a private company or a hospital owns the ambulance. When problems arise, ask for an itemized bill and seek out such "patient representatives" at the hospital."

So, to Madame L's original questioner: You were right to refuse to accept any help from the ambulance service, as long as you were indeed healthy and did not need the service.

And, to Madame L's recent commenter: How lucky you are to live in a country where your health care needs are covered without having to resort to private profit-making companies and their "services."

Best wishes to all,

Madame L

It's Okay to Make Fun of Mormons, Right?

Dear and Gentle Readers,

Madame L realizes that the anti-Mormon atmosphere will be growing worse now because of Mitt Romney's presidential campaign. Madame L has seen TV commentators who are proud of their Catholicism, for instance, and proud that JFK was a Catholic, blast Romney for being a Mormon---and appear to get away with it.

Mean-spirited pundits are preparing already to outflank those who object to their meanness by claiming that any unfavorable response to anti-Mormon "jokes" must be classified as unfair accusations of "bigotry." 

Madame L, as you recall, wrote last week about MSNBC "The Last Word" host Lawrence O'Donnell's bigotry. O'Donnell claimed that Joseph Smith started the Mormon church "when he got caught having sex with the maid and explained to his wife that God told him to do it..." O'Donnell went on to claim that the whole religion was invented to "sanctify" Joseph Smith's polygamy.  

Madame L was appalled that O'Donnell could get away with saying such a thing on the air and is relieved to read that someone else, apparently not a member of the LDS church, agrees with her, calling O'Donnell a "bigot," which is the appropriate term. Kevin D. Williamson, in National Review Online, has announced that O'Donnell is receiving the first Golden Ass Award, "to be presented to those who resort to anti-Mormon bigotry in their campaign against Mitt Romney."

While Madame L disagrees with almost everything ever published in The National Review (online or in print), she's happy to agree with Williamson on this issue.

Madame L is also fascinated---yes, fascinated, but not edified---to read in Williamson's column that "Wikipedia informs us that Lawrence O’Donnell has half as many ex-wives as Newt Gingrich." Madame L doesn't hold this against O'Donnell but holds it up as an example of the level to which our political discourse has fallen.

Madame L would  like to see and hear all of us reflect on the political issues at hand, not the personal and religious beliefs, of all the candidates---and even the commentators, whether they deserve it or not.

Madame L hopes that when any of you, Dear Readers, no matter your religious and moral beliefs, or your political inclinations and affiliations, will make your views known. When falsehoods are spoken, correct them. When attitudes of hatred and bigotry are evidenced, point it out. 

Sincerely,

Madame L

The Book Review, Sunday, April 8, 2012: Matthew 28

Madame L is enjoying this beautiful Easter Sunday, thinking of Jesus Christ's life and resurrection. Instead of reviewing some mundane book, Madame L shares this passage with her Dear Readers, wishing them a happy Easter, too:

	In the end of the sabbath, as it began to dawn toward the first day of the week, came Mary Mag'dalene and the other Mary to see the sepulchre.
	And, behold, there was a great earthquake: for the angel of the Lord descended from heaven, and came and rolled back the stone from the door, and sat upon it.
	His countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow:
	and for fear of him the keepers did shake, and became as dead men.
	And the angel answered and said unto the women, Fear not ye: for I know that ye seek Jesus, which was crucified.
	He is not here: for he is risen, as he said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay.
	And go quickly, and tell his disciples that he is risen from the dead; and, behold, he goeth before you into Galilee; there shall ye see him: lo, I have told you.
	And they departed quickly from the sepulchre with fear and great joy; and did run to bring his disciples word.
	And as they went to tell his disciples, behold, Jesus met them, saying, All hail. And they came and held him by the feet, and worshipped him.
	Then said Jesus unto them, Be not afraid: go tell my brethren that they go into Galilee, and there shall they see me.
	Now when they were going, behold, some of the watch came into the city, and showed unto the chief priests all the things that were done.
	And when they were assembled with the elders, and had taken counsel, they gave large money unto the soldiers,
	saying, Say ye, His disciples came by night, and stole him away while we slept.
	And if this come to the governor's ears, we will persuade him, and secure you.
	So they took the money, and did as they were taught: and this saying is commonly reported among the Jews until this day.

Is Lawrence O'Donnell Channeling Glenn Beck?

Dear Madame L,

Did you see "The Last Word" with Lawrence O'Donnell last night (Tuesday, April 3, 2012)? He claimed that Joseph Smith started the Mormon Church in 1830 to keep from getting his wife mad about his having sex with their maid.

Have you ever heard of such a thing?

Sincerely,

Astounded

Dear Astounded,

Yes, unfortunately, Madame L has heard of such things as this, specifically in attacks on the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints; in attacks on its members who, like Mitt Romney, have the temerity to enter politics to try to perform their civic duty; and generally in attacks on any individual group that any random "pundit" or news "commentator" may want to smear. Or, Madame L must add, any individual or group that such a pundit or commentator may want to provoke into a response.

Madame L occasionally watches "The Last Word"---less often lately, now that Lawrence O'Donnell has gone into full attack mode against Mitt Romney---and happened to see the very report to which you're referring. Madame L also happened to see Mr. O'Donnell begin his attack the evening before (Monday, April 2, 2012), when he said Mr. Romney has "a religion problem."

You can find videos of both segments on "The Last Word" --- though there's no reason to look at them because you'll just see Mr. O'Donnell stooping to the level of Glenn Beck, making outrageous statements he can't possibly back up, and even standing in front of a special screen (a step up from a ridiculous black-board, Madame L supposes) to make those statements.

Mr. O'Donnell, even though Madame L agrees with you that Mitt Romney shouldn't be the next president of the United States, Madame L strongly condemns your willingness to lie and make outrageous statements you know are not true in order to make a point that (if it needs to be made, which Madame L doesn't believe) could be made in a balanced and professional journalistic manner.

Stop stooping, Mr. O'Donnell. And get your facts straight.

Sincerely,

Madame L

Refusing Ambulance Service?

Dear Madame L,

This morning I went to the gym to do my usual half-mile swim, then sat in the steam room for about 10 minutes. I started seeing funny spots in front of my eyes and felt weak and lightheaded, so put my head down between my knees until I felt better, but when I tried to get up to walk, I felt faint again. So I lay down on my side on one of the benches by the pool. 

Some guy who had just finished swimming laps asked if I was okay, and I said yes, just feeling a little faint, and then another guy came over, and then two employees of the fitness place. One guy said he was a fireman and could he take my pulse and I said sure. 

He said it was about 80, and I said that's high for me, and he asked what's my usual resting pulse and I said 64, and he said did I feel nausea or chest pains and did I have a history of heart problems and I said no, no, and no; and he said okay he was going to go back to swimming now so I didn't feel so crowded and I said thanks. 

But then one of the other people said they should call an ambulance and I said no, no ambulance! I'm sure I'm just dehydrated. I said if someone has a phone I'll call my husband who works nearby and he can come. So I gave that first guy the phone number and he called on his smart phone and I talked to my husband, who said he would be right there. 

Then another employee showed up with a huge bottle of some Gatorade-like drink, and I took a few swallows, thanked everyone and got up to leave. The guy with the phone said two women should walk with me through the women's dressing room to make sure I was okay. So another female employee showed up and the two of them followed me into the dressing room and stood there watching me put on my shirt and shorts over my bathing suit. 

Then one of them said an ambulance had been called and I said, no, no ambulance!  I walked as fast as I could out to the front and one of them said I had to wait for the ambulance to arrive and I said the ambulance isn't here yet? That's pretty useless isn't it! (Because, really, Madame L, if I had really been having a heart attack, that was about five minutes later, and they would have been too late to save me, wouldn't they!)

Right then I saw my husband drive up so I started to leave and they said no you have to stay and I said No I don't need to go to the hospital, I'm fine, and I can't afford to pay for the ambulance, and they said, No they won't take you to the hospital they just need to ask you some questions and I said No I can't afford to pay for them to ask me some questions, and they said Oh don't worry it won't cost you any money and I said Oh yes it will and they said Not if they just talk to you and I said Oh yes it will, I'm leaving. So I went out and got in the car and left. And of course I'm fine. 

So, I have two questions:  Was I wrong to refuse to wait for the ambulance? Would I have had to pay just for letting them ask me a few questions?

Sincerely,

Healthy AND Can't Afford an Ambulance Ride

Dear Healthy,

Madame L is relieved that you're okay. She hopes you're grateful to those concerned individuals and employees who were doing the best they could for you by calling an ambulance. She also sincerely hopes that if you did need the ambulance ride, you would accept it; and reminds you that there may be times when people do need an ambulance ride but don't realize it.

On the other hand, Madame L really sympathizes with you for refusing the help.  Madame L has read recent reports in her own area suggesting that emergency response people may sometimes give "help" that isn't needed, and then charge a lot of money for it. For example, an older woman fell and skinned her knee at a Fourth of July celebration, walked to a nearby booth manned by a private ambulance company, and was given a small plastic bandage even though she said she had one in her car which was nearby; she later received a bill for over $600 for this "service."

Madame L has tried to find out more information on this topic, but the private ambulance companies are (understandably) reluctant to advertise their billing practices. Madame L doesn't know if the ambulance company would have been satisfied with your answering "a few questions" or would have insisted on getting your name and contact information so they could later send you a bill.

Madame L has been able to find this article pointing out that many health insurance companies refuse to pay for ambulance services, leaving people like you paying hundreds or even thousands of dollars for a ride, even a necessary ride, to the hospital.

Here's an information sheet from American Medical Response (AMR), one of the more commonly used private ambulance companies, explaining why these companies send you the bill even when you've called your local 9-1-1 number instead of calling a private ambulance.

This document, from a local government emergency service office, shows just what kind of information the emergency personnel might have asked for (and also reveals that the "just a few questions" they may have asked you would indeed have been enough for them to send you a bill later). Here's what they would report to their supervisors:

1. Unit number
2. Incident date
3. Incident time
4. Call receipt time
5. Dispatch time
6. Arrival at scene time
7. Incident location
8. Patient’s Name, Age and date of birth, Gender, Weight, Address (emphasis added), Chief complaint, Vital signs, and
9. Appropriate physical assessment
10. Emergency care rendered, and the patient’s response to such treatment
11. Patient disposition
12. Scene departure time
13. Arrival at receiving hospital time

If you had stayed long enough to chat with the ambulance personnel and refused their services, here is an example of a form you may have had to fill out.

 

Dear Readers, if you have any first-hand experience with this issue, please comment or send Madame L an email message with any additional information that may help all her readers.

Best wishes for your continued health and safety,

Madame L

The Book Review, Sunday, April 1, 2012: Meaning, Medicine and the 'Placebo Effect'

Have you ever had such an incredible headache that aspirin couldn't touch it but then someone suggested going to the movie and even though you didn't feel like it you went and once you got into the movie you felt no pain and then when the movie was over you suddenly realized you hadn't been in pain but as soon as you realized that the pain came back?

That's not an example of the placebo effect, but it does show just how much the pain we feel can be influenced by what's going on around us.

In "Meaning, Medicine and the 'Placebo Effect,'" by Daniel Moerman, we get insight into something even more difficult to understand: the fact that illnesses can be "cured" as well as pain relieved by chemically inert medical treatments. In fact, just being seen by a kind and caring medical professional, and especially receiving a diagnosis, can "cure" a person in many cases.

Here are just a few of the factors involved:

---Culture of origin:  If you believe that being born under certain astrological signs makes you unlucky or likely to die from a certain disease, the chances that you will die from that disease are much greater than for someone who does not share that belief.

---Country of origin: If you're American, you may think that getting a shot will help you get well better than taking a pill will, and you'll probably be right.

---Disease or diagnosis: Conditions ranging from lumbar disk herniation to Meniere's disease have been "cured" equally well by real surgery and "negative operations." But if you have a headache, taking a "placebo" pill will not be as helpful as taking a real aspirin (though going to a movie may help!).

---The patient's own life experiences and cultural background: This is huge, ranging from whether you're an optimist or not (patients who rated their own health as "excellent" had better than twice as good a chance of being still alive after several years as those who rated their health as "poor").

---The patient's confidence in the doctor or surgeon's ability and success: Some patients who received nothing more than three pin-pricks in their knees instead of actual arthroscopic surgery were "cured" and remained pain free for years afterwards; the same kind of results were repeated for many kinds of surgeries and treatments.

---The kind and color of the pill or capsule and the amount prescribed: Why do you think Viagra pills are blue?  Why do you think if two sugar pills make your headache go away, then four sugar pills make it go away even faster? Aha! There's something to this...

Moerman writes in his "Acknowledgments" section, "I have had great fun with this project; I kept telling myself how easy it would be to write a 'placebo book' because it doesn't have anything in it." He isn't just discussing placebos, though. He's discussing meaning in medicine, putting together his own many years of research as a medical anthropologist with research done by other anthropologists and medical professionals over decades.

With all this in mind, what would Moerman do if he were told he needed coronary artery bypass surgery, for instance? He writes:

"As with any serious and dangerous procedure, I'd first seek a second opinion. If the second opinion were the same as the first, I would go ahead with the procedure. I would want an enthusiastic and very experienced surgeon (I know just the guy), and I would ask him to be as non-invasive as possible....I would ask that they play Louis Armstrong recordings during the operation--loudly!--and that I be able to listen to Stan Getz and Joao Gilberto in the recovery room.

"And, when I have a headache, or some aches or pains in my back or leg, I shake two ibuprofen tablets into my hand, I look at them carefully, and I say, 'Guys, you are the best, the most powerful and trouble-free drugs in the world.' Or something like that. Then, with a large glass of water ('Water is good, too,' I think carefully to myself), down the hatch.

"You know what I mean."

And there you have it. Madame L highly recommends this book. You don't have to be a doctor or an anthropologist to enjoy it. You should, however, be willing to give up some of your carefully cherished beliefs about medicine and healing, about placebos and their place in medicine and healing, and about yourself.